Halfway through middle school and she is not loving it.
She turns 11 only 2 weeks before school starts. This means that in many cases she is almost 6 months to 1 year younger than her classmates. She isn't in a hurry to grow up and I am not in a hurry to grow up. I don't think she needs makeup or strapless dresses or go on dates yet. But she is surrounded with this on a daily basis. Not everyone but many of the people that she goes to school with are in such a hurry to grow up. She feels pressure enough that she remarks on it. She wishes she were still in elementary school in her one class with her teacher that adored her and her friends. She rarely sees those friends. They are not in her classes and they don't share her lunch period.
My girl is desperately unhappy and so am I watching her. Every day brings a complaint of a headache or a stomachache. I know that so much of it is because of school. My sweet girl who never missed a day if she could help it now begs to stay home. She calls me to come and get her early.
Last week she cried and cried about a boy that was bullying her at lunch and so I talked to her teacher. Her teacher was wonderful and understanding and it is being addressed but in the process of all of this she has found out that people she considered friends are not friends. When she moved lunch seats because of the bullying , they stayed to sit with the bully and her feelings were hurt. Abby loves her friends and would do anything for them and would stand up for them and to not have that reciprocated breaks her heart.
It isn't that easy to say, "this too shall pass," because I am watching her confidence being eroded. I am watching my formerly happy girl be desperately unhappy. I see the light in her on Fridays and on Saturday and watch it slowly dim on Sundays as she realizes that school is the next day. I know that her dad thinks it will be okay. Ironic because it still talks about the teasing that took place when he was that age and how it affected him.
There really are not any alternatives right now. Another public school would bring the same situation. Homeschooling is not an option. Private school is not affordable.
And so I pray. I pray every night for her to have strength to know herself and know how much we, her family love her and how much Jesus loves her and how very unimportant any of these people are. And I pray for me, pray that I am the mom she needs and that the comfort and love that I give her will help her stay strong.
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